This is Joseph Benjamin. At one time Joseph was a renowned athlete with a promising future. Courted by both the NBA and the NFL, he was looking forward to fame and riches. Then, in a comi-tragic turn of events, he was derailed by life.
Playing a few rounds of golf with Tiger Woods just prior to the British Open, Joseph worked up a mighty thirst. Before you know it, he was ensconced in the local British pub, quaffing pints of ale and stuffing his face with fish and chips. One thing led to another and his eventual arrest for stripping naked in the House of Commons led to his being deported.
Determined to restore his reputation, Joseph set out for the
U.S.A., only to find his passport was missing.
“I’m sure you can get another passport,” said the immigration official, “All you have to do is go to the U.S. Embassy, which is right down the street.”
“Fine,” said Joseph, “I’ll go right now.”
“Oh, I can’t let you go,” said the immigration official, “You’ll need a passport to get through. If you don’t have a passport I’ll have to throw you in jail.”
And thus began a life of vagrancy and trauma, as Joseph, befallen on all sides by tyrannical customs and immigration officials, wandered the globe in hopes of encountering the one person who could land him a tryout with either the Miami Heat or Miami Dolphins, the only two franchises sorry enough to sign him. It didn’t happen, and now Joseph spends his time drinking vodka stingers, crying, and working on ASV’s in
Your Passport: Don’t leave home without it.